There's a wide spectrum of girls' appetites and attitudes about how they want their eating capability to be perceived by others. I'm referring mainly to the quantity of food. Some girls just have smaller appetites. Some girls force themselves to eat less in order to sculpt themselves into their idea of their own "perfect body". Some just eat to their heart's content as long as it's reasonably healthy, or they're able to compensate for the caloric intake through other means (e.g. exercise). But the one type of girl that has stood out to me lately is the one that, weirdly enough, wants people to think they eat a lot--often more than they actually do. It's kind of weird actually...I don't know why but for some reason it reminds me of reverse discrimination. Anyway, worst analogy but let me attempt to explain where I think this "big eater" mentality comes from.
Many girls who "watch what they eat" are doing so to avoid "getting fat". As you know such situations may progress to the point of a girl becoming anorexic (diagnosis: anorexia nervosa). Even when it doesn't, the comment always comes out in one form or another (jokingly or not): "Omg, that girl is so anorexic" or "How come you don't eat a lot? Are you anorexic?" Sometimes I worry this awareness (great!) of the disease has actually created more of a stigma (not so great...) around it; thus some girls don't want people to think they have smaller appetites (because God forbid that would make you an "anorexic") and make a show of how much they eat. This is one rationale I believe to be behind this. Another one may be that this "big eater" mentality is a passive aggressive form of bragging. A lot of the girls that engage in this behaviour are quite skinny, so I believe they adopt this behaviour to make it obvious that they eat a lot but still manage to maintain their image. Think about it--how many plus size girls with big appetites aggressively publicize how much they eat?
I guess I made this post to rant about one of the appetite types that have been bugging me lately. I can't even blame these girls entirely because their behaviour is, I believe, a result of societal circumstance. I personally can vouch for the societal behaviours shaping the "big eater" attitude because I have felt the need to adopt it from time to time.
One time a guy was trying to point out (in a mocking tone) how little I was eating at a sushi buffet saying that I don't eat anything and that he eats sooo much more than me. There are several things I'd like to point out about this story:
A. I'm not a huge fan of sushi, so obviously I'm not going to go all out eating. Of course when people like a certain food, they'll often magically have more room to eat it--EXHIBIT A: DESSERT.
B. Many times people mistakenly assume I eat less than them because they continue eating longer than me. That is flawed thinking because I'm a relatively quick eater, so comparing the end times of our meals says nothing about who ate more.
C. I pointed out a past situation where we both ordered medium pizzas from the same restaurant at the same time where I finished my whole pizza in one sitting and he ate maybe 5 out of the 8 slices. When I brought up this incident, his response was that he could have eaten it all if he wanted to. Even in the unlikely scenario where that may have been true, the fact that I was hungry enough to eat my whole pizza but he wasn't indicates that I have a larger appetite.
D. Calm yourself, it's not a contest. Even if it was, males tend to be physically larger than females on the average, so your picking a fight with me over this is really quite pathetic.
Anyway, I'm surprised myself that a guy is involved in such a scenario. I would think that girls are usually worse at making other girls feel bad about their eating habits; that's just how girls are. I think it relates to the motivations for why girls judge other girls and the comments they make. Females like to see how they compare to other females and because of our sensitive side we may harbour feelings of envy that come out as potentially passive-aggressive comments in order to feel better about ourselves.
Basically, what I can glean from my reflection of this attitude and the forces that have shaped it is that we need to stop commenting on how much people, particularly girls, eat. Especially at our weight-gaining age, it can be a bit of a sensitive topic, and people have their personal reasons for their own eating habits. It's juvenile to make it a contest or pass judgement.
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Monday, November 10, 2014
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Out of Perspective
At every level of school--elementary, high school, and university--I thought I was in the worst years of my life at the time. Mostly because I felt pretty crappy about myself and the people around me everywhere I went...and it still holds true today. Never once did I acknowledge my current situation as a "good" time, but given the perspective I have today, I think my favourite years were during elementary school. I suppose my friends of that part of my life were the "truest" and really appreciated/knew me for who I really was; those relationships were also the most meaningful (aside from the romantic relationships of course). The kids around me surprisingly dealt with a lot of tough things at such a young age. I think I can also remember being truly happy then.
Today? I was wrong about my peers. They don't make me feel good; my early feelings were masked by the adrenaline-fed anticipation of a new term. This is just another stop I have to get through on the long journey of life. Hopefully I have the good sense to make the best of it while I'm here. I'm trying to care, but it's tough. What's in a name? That which we call a friend would by any other name be as meaningless.
Then again, considering the whole idea of perspective addressed in this post, maybe I'll look back to these years (i.e. undergrad) and think they were the best years of my life--but most likely not.
Today? I was wrong about my peers. They don't make me feel good; my early feelings were masked by the adrenaline-fed anticipation of a new term. This is just another stop I have to get through on the long journey of life. Hopefully I have the good sense to make the best of it while I'm here. I'm trying to care, but it's tough. What's in a name? That which we call a friend would by any other name be as meaningless.
Then again, considering the whole idea of perspective addressed in this post, maybe I'll look back to these years (i.e. undergrad) and think they were the best years of my life--but most likely not.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Facebook Groups are Stupid
You can usually discern (pretty accurately) the quality of something based on the main qualities of its creator/leader--that's how I know most facebook groups are stupid. The people who created them ALMOST ALWAYS have some kind of grammar or spelling mistake that makes their "witty" title idiotic and embarrassing to any members. Then again, perhaps the quality of the group and the leadership is also consistent with the type of people who end up joining. In the end, this complaint is likely doomed to go unheard...
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Mixed Feelings
So lately, I've had a string of ups and downs, as I suppose is typical of the great mystery we call life.
1. I actually got a co-op job! I'll be working as a Research Assistant in Harrow for a governmental organization. Should be interesting because we're doing work with bees to implant a non-chemical pest control agent into plants via the natural pollination process. I have already settled my housing and am currently going through the tedious preparatory paperwork. I plan to catch up on all the TV shows that I am in the middle of (i.e. Dexter, One Tree Hill, True Blood, etc.) and go for a run every day to lose some of the unhealthy fat I've built up over the past year. It feels great to not have to worry about job searching anymore. Thank you, Dr. Shipp, for hiring me, despite the sinking feeling that I already know you have made a fatal mistake--and thank you, God, for making this miracle possible.
2. As are many of my peers stuck in school this summer, I am stuck in the middle of midterm season. =( Unfortunately, a lot of my friends have already finished or are nearing the end of their exams, while I still have a ways to go. I have written 2 Psychs, 2 Econs, 1 Math, 1 English Essay, and 1 Physics. As far as I know I still have at least 1 Math and 1 Psych left to write. Despite having written over 75% of my exams, I still haven't found the discipline to sit myself down and do some serious studying. I'm not sure whether it is the slack schedule in my past co-op term or the lovely summer season that has totally decimated whatever study habits were sustaining my academic life before, but it's sure taking its toll this term. I haven't been pulling good grades to my maximum potential in any subject. Even after a near failure on my Math test, I was only fazed for a few days, and the effect has kind of numbed by this point...and I don't know what to do?
3. I've gotten back into cooking--without the food poisoning, believe it or not. Mind you, my cooking is not in any sense of enjoyable gourmet cuisine calibre, but rather a survival instinct. Luckily, I've managed to shy away from the monotonous stir fry chicken dish that sustained me from September 2009-February 2010. Miraculous how that disgusting piece of crap even sustained me for that long, I know. With a bit of guidance from my cooking-keen housemate Sandra, I've managed to pull off an edible version of spaghetti. Also, in a desperate attempt to make do with the few ingredients I have, I marinated some thinly sliced pork loins with soya sauce and lemon sauce. It was unsettlingly...yummy--but can I even use that word for my cooking in ANY context? O_o
OHH Food relationship update: I've gotten into adding lemon juice and parsley into ALL my dishes. You can never go wrong with parsley <3
4. As usual, I'm still quite lost as to the direction my future will take. It makes me depressed to hear about my peers getting into professional schools already, while I'm still struggling to fit the pre-requisites into my ridiculous co-op-invaded schedule--not to mention striving to achieve a decent grade in each course. Something funny--but not really--that was brought up in psych class that I'd like to share...ironically, it's from the chapter on Motivation. Hah! Anyway, as soon as I saw the slide listing, I immediately identified myself as having identity diffusion, somewhat pridefully too!
-identity diffusion: inability to commit, no sense of direction, no choices
-identity achievement: successful identity realization
-identity foreclosure: pressured into making an early decision
-identity moratorium: struggling between choices; supposedly where most uni students are
Unfortunately, I was disappointed when my professor went through the list explaining each, and for identity diffusion, all she said was something along the lines of, "These individuals have social and academic problems. They're just in general confused."
With my new-found academic slump and all my friends starting to actually apply for and get into professional schools, I'm developing a fear of being left behind...
5. In a lame attempt to be what we foolishly value--optimistic--I recognize that with my decreased effort into my studies, there is a slight tradeoff in terms of the current enjoyment I am getting out of life.
For one, I've been going to euchre club on a regular basis this term, and I love it, as always--although not solely for the same reasons I'm used to. I've actually started to make a few friends at this club, and I've started talking to one particular loser this term. Good times...and I accomplished all this without improving my social skills in the slightest. Ah, the wonders of facebook and MSN! =)
Second, I've also been spending more time with my friends and indulging in that oh so lovely ethanol. In fact, I've developed a new friend in Smirnoff Ice and its delicate cousin Twisted Green Apple, especially in settings such as King, Tub thumper, and other *cough...games. =)
I guess it wouldn't hurt to end off on a happy note:
I just had a conversation with my brother earlier tonight, and it was probably one of the most civilized conversations I have ever had with him for at least 6 years (before he became an immature dick). I was actually very proud to hear that he was interested in striving for decent programs at specific universities in order to pursue a career in music. Sadly, that is more than I can say about the circumstances under which I chose to enter my own program.
Anyways, I truly believe he has a talent in violin, and it's about time he appreciated this enough to want to do something about it. It seems the late-blooming maturity too characteristic of the male species has finally begun to poke its head out from his overgrown mop of hair.
I'm proud of my brother Robert, and I believe in him now that he has finally decided to believe in himself. =)
1. I actually got a co-op job! I'll be working as a Research Assistant in Harrow for a governmental organization. Should be interesting because we're doing work with bees to implant a non-chemical pest control agent into plants via the natural pollination process. I have already settled my housing and am currently going through the tedious preparatory paperwork. I plan to catch up on all the TV shows that I am in the middle of (i.e. Dexter, One Tree Hill, True Blood, etc.) and go for a run every day to lose some of the unhealthy fat I've built up over the past year. It feels great to not have to worry about job searching anymore. Thank you, Dr. Shipp, for hiring me, despite the sinking feeling that I already know you have made a fatal mistake--and thank you, God, for making this miracle possible.
2. As are many of my peers stuck in school this summer, I am stuck in the middle of midterm season. =( Unfortunately, a lot of my friends have already finished or are nearing the end of their exams, while I still have a ways to go. I have written 2 Psychs, 2 Econs, 1 Math, 1 English Essay, and 1 Physics. As far as I know I still have at least 1 Math and 1 Psych left to write. Despite having written over 75% of my exams, I still haven't found the discipline to sit myself down and do some serious studying. I'm not sure whether it is the slack schedule in my past co-op term or the lovely summer season that has totally decimated whatever study habits were sustaining my academic life before, but it's sure taking its toll this term. I haven't been pulling good grades to my maximum potential in any subject. Even after a near failure on my Math test, I was only fazed for a few days, and the effect has kind of numbed by this point...and I don't know what to do?
3. I've gotten back into cooking--without the food poisoning, believe it or not. Mind you, my cooking is not in any sense of enjoyable gourmet cuisine calibre, but rather a survival instinct. Luckily, I've managed to shy away from the monotonous stir fry chicken dish that sustained me from September 2009-February 2010. Miraculous how that disgusting piece of crap even sustained me for that long, I know. With a bit of guidance from my cooking-keen housemate Sandra, I've managed to pull off an edible version of spaghetti. Also, in a desperate attempt to make do with the few ingredients I have, I marinated some thinly sliced pork loins with soya sauce and lemon sauce. It was unsettlingly...yummy--but can I even use that word for my cooking in ANY context? O_o
OHH Food relationship update: I've gotten into adding lemon juice and parsley into ALL my dishes. You can never go wrong with parsley <3
4. As usual, I'm still quite lost as to the direction my future will take. It makes me depressed to hear about my peers getting into professional schools already, while I'm still struggling to fit the pre-requisites into my ridiculous co-op-invaded schedule--not to mention striving to achieve a decent grade in each course. Something funny--but not really--that was brought up in psych class that I'd like to share...ironically, it's from the chapter on Motivation. Hah! Anyway, as soon as I saw the slide listing, I immediately identified myself as having identity diffusion, somewhat pridefully too!
-identity diffusion: inability to commit, no sense of direction, no choices
-identity achievement: successful identity realization
-identity foreclosure: pressured into making an early decision
-identity moratorium: struggling between choices; supposedly where most uni students are
Unfortunately, I was disappointed when my professor went through the list explaining each, and for identity diffusion, all she said was something along the lines of, "These individuals have social and academic problems. They're just in general confused."
With my new-found academic slump and all my friends starting to actually apply for and get into professional schools, I'm developing a fear of being left behind...
5. In a lame attempt to be what we foolishly value--optimistic--I recognize that with my decreased effort into my studies, there is a slight tradeoff in terms of the current enjoyment I am getting out of life.
For one, I've been going to euchre club on a regular basis this term, and I love it, as always--although not solely for the same reasons I'm used to. I've actually started to make a few friends at this club, and I've started talking to one particular loser this term. Good times...and I accomplished all this without improving my social skills in the slightest. Ah, the wonders of facebook and MSN! =)
Second, I've also been spending more time with my friends and indulging in that oh so lovely ethanol. In fact, I've developed a new friend in Smirnoff Ice and its delicate cousin Twisted Green Apple, especially in settings such as King, Tub thumper, and other *cough...games. =)
I guess it wouldn't hurt to end off on a happy note:
I just had a conversation with my brother earlier tonight, and it was probably one of the most civilized conversations I have ever had with him for at least 6 years (before he became an immature dick). I was actually very proud to hear that he was interested in striving for decent programs at specific universities in order to pursue a career in music. Sadly, that is more than I can say about the circumstances under which I chose to enter my own program.
Anyways, I truly believe he has a talent in violin, and it's about time he appreciated this enough to want to do something about it. It seems the late-blooming maturity too characteristic of the male species has finally begun to poke its head out from his overgrown mop of hair.
I'm proud of my brother Robert, and I believe in him now that he has finally decided to believe in himself. =)
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
In Good Co-mpany
So this term I am on co-op by some divine miracle. Not taking this term for granted, I am also taking Microbiology (distance ed), a Monday night Physiology Lab, and coordinating the UW English Tutors Club. If you didn't know yet, I am currently working as a Marketing Associate at Co-operative Education and Career Services at UW. "What do you do?", you may ask (and many of you already have). Well, seeing as how I am interviewing for my position tomorrow, it can't be a bad thing that I've managed to narrow down my broad responsibilities to a few key points:
1. Event planning/coordination: Prepare event briefs, develop post-event surveys for internal review, attend meetings, and assist in leads followup (e.g. prepare communications templates and research key contacts in target organizations).
2. Undertake independent projects that are geared towards improving the usefulness/availability of marketing and/or sales tools. For example, conduct a SWOT Analysis of the Field Co-ordinator website. Looking into improving the organization and incorporating facilitative marketing materials.
3. Long-term team projects within the co-op student team of the Marketing&Communications Department. For example, we are creating a unified brand image for three very different publications and drawing up a proposal + cost summary for a new tradeshow booth design. Both very exciting projects!
4. Interview Duty Services: All co-op students at TC are scheduled for 3 hours at a time to either greet employers, work at the paging desk, or help coordinate phone interviews at the call centre.
The first few weeks, I started off with my lovely little packed lunches, 10pm bedtime, a disciplined studying schedule for managing my courses, an 8:00 wakeup time--and now none of that remains true to date. Anyways, as the title somewhat implies, I have been able to survive this term mainly because I am surrounded by great co-op co-workers at Tatham Centre.
1. Justina: When I first came into work, I saw her name tag in the cubicle right next to mine. I thought it must have been someone else--there's no way we're working beside each other! Lo and behold, she showed up and her supervisor tried to introduce us--"Oh, we already know each other." Don't you love when that happens? =) Anyways, for some reason in the first few weeks of the term, Justina and I always brought our lunches on the same days and forgot to pack it on the same days, so we always went over to the Festival Room for random meals. As Kyle says, we're N'SYNC. O_o. It was/still is quite an adventure to see what random dish they were going to serve today. Justina's job is pretty dependent on whether people have submitted their forms or not, so a lot of the time she is discovering hilarious new websites and thankfully has no problem sharing them with me, which is probably the only thing keeping me sane at work. Both of us have also decorated our ugly old-school computer monitors with random origami paraphernalia. We also stay an extra hour once in a while doing intense overtime tasks......
2. Cynthia: I didn't know this crazy little Asian very well before this work term, although we're also in the same program-ish. Trust me, now that I know her, I can still say SHE IS CRAZY. SHE GOES OUT AND DOWNS BEERS LIKE NO TOMORROW. FRIDAY NIGHTS--YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND HER! But seriously, Cynthia's such a nice, cute person, you can't help but make fun of her and want to hang around such a nice person. She also asks the funniest questions, "Okay, so tell me is _____ a guy or a girl?!?!?!?!" I have recently converted her to the religion: Euchremania.
3. Qi: My fellow Marketing&Communications buddy! Poor Qi is always stuck updating her brutal excel inventory of the CECS website, so I try to send her entertaining emails or pay her visits as often as I remember to. To be honest, when I first met Qi, I thought she was a very serious Asian--one has to be if they're in Math and Business Double Degree right?!--WRONG. Qi's so hilarious because she makes the driest comments when you least expect them. She's also very smart and down-to-earth. Normally, I get along better with guys because they're less ditzy, but Qi can make guys seem ditzy. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying she's MANLY--no, that's apparently my job--you should see her play badminton; she drives the bird over the net and then manages to pull off that Asian sign so well without looking like an annoying fob. ^-^V
Interesting Fact: I recognized that Qi lived on my street within the first few days because I recognized her distinctive red Coach purse. THAT'S RIGHT I AM THE PRO CREEPER. No, seriously--no one appreciates brand names fashion and style more than Qi (mind you, an appreciation practiced in healthy moderation).
4. Cathy: If I had to vouch for anyone's dedication and hard work in TC, it would be for Cathy. She always takes a half lunch and stays late whenever she has to hang around campus for class anyway. At first glance, Cathy seems like a shy, quiet Asian. Wrong. Again. Not only is she a valuable employee, but she is also a great friend and fun to hang around. However, I am extremely mad at her because she has shown up to 1 out of our 4 outings--NOT A PASSING GRADE--forget Macroecon, Cathy. Come to the darkside; we have cookies. ^-^
5. Brian: So after I talk about this co-worker, I'll talk about the guys--oh wait, I completely forgot Brian was a guy because he's always showing up to the outings when all the other guys ditch!! My first impression of Brian was that he was a nerd, only hanging out with us to invite us to play DS during our breaks. Annnd my impression hasn't changed--just kidding. Brian's a nice guy, my mixed doubles buddy, and my partner in crime for bullying Cynthia. *high five, Brian Kim Chi.
6. Matt: Okay, this is the only person at CECS that I do not like AT ALL. Like seriously. He always makes me laugh, he makes amazing lunches for himself every day, and he visits me at least twice a day just to say what's up. I call him my guidance counsellor for what English courses to (not) take. Seriously, how can you not hate him too? P.S. He and Cathy are tied at a failing grade of 25%. Tsk.Tsk.Tsk.
So yeah, pretty much I've made some amazing friends at CECS. At the beginning of the term, I was a little hesitant about going on co-op outings--like oh man things are going to be so awkward! Nothing against these people or my first impressions of them, but I'm just not that good at getting to know new people. Now that I know them much better and our hangouts have become a must (instead of some strange networking/co-worker courtesy thing), I hope our new-found friendships are meant to last us through our dreaded extended education here in UW.
Thank you, co-op. We indeed have a love-hate relationship going on here.
1. Event planning/coordination: Prepare event briefs, develop post-event surveys for internal review, attend meetings, and assist in leads followup (e.g. prepare communications templates and research key contacts in target organizations).
2. Undertake independent projects that are geared towards improving the usefulness/availability of marketing and/or sales tools. For example, conduct a SWOT Analysis of the Field Co-ordinator website. Looking into improving the organization and incorporating facilitative marketing materials.
3. Long-term team projects within the co-op student team of the Marketing&Communications Department. For example, we are creating a unified brand image for three very different publications and drawing up a proposal + cost summary for a new tradeshow booth design. Both very exciting projects!
4. Interview Duty Services: All co-op students at TC are scheduled for 3 hours at a time to either greet employers, work at the paging desk, or help coordinate phone interviews at the call centre.
The first few weeks, I started off with my lovely little packed lunches, 10pm bedtime, a disciplined studying schedule for managing my courses, an 8:00 wakeup time--and now none of that remains true to date. Anyways, as the title somewhat implies, I have been able to survive this term mainly because I am surrounded by great co-op co-workers at Tatham Centre.
1. Justina: When I first came into work, I saw her name tag in the cubicle right next to mine. I thought it must have been someone else--there's no way we're working beside each other! Lo and behold, she showed up and her supervisor tried to introduce us--"Oh, we already know each other." Don't you love when that happens? =) Anyways, for some reason in the first few weeks of the term, Justina and I always brought our lunches on the same days and forgot to pack it on the same days, so we always went over to the Festival Room for random meals. As Kyle says, we're N'SYNC. O_o. It was/still is quite an adventure to see what random dish they were going to serve today. Justina's job is pretty dependent on whether people have submitted their forms or not, so a lot of the time she is discovering hilarious new websites and thankfully has no problem sharing them with me, which is probably the only thing keeping me sane at work. Both of us have also decorated our ugly old-school computer monitors with random origami paraphernalia. We also stay an extra hour once in a while doing intense overtime tasks......
2. Cynthia: I didn't know this crazy little Asian very well before this work term, although we're also in the same program-ish. Trust me, now that I know her, I can still say SHE IS CRAZY. SHE GOES OUT AND DOWNS BEERS LIKE NO TOMORROW. FRIDAY NIGHTS--YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND HER! But seriously, Cynthia's such a nice, cute person, you can't help but make fun of her and want to hang around such a nice person. She also asks the funniest questions, "Okay, so tell me is _____ a guy or a girl?!?!?!?!" I have recently converted her to the religion: Euchremania.
3. Qi: My fellow Marketing&Communications buddy! Poor Qi is always stuck updating her brutal excel inventory of the CECS website, so I try to send her entertaining emails or pay her visits as often as I remember to. To be honest, when I first met Qi, I thought she was a very serious Asian--one has to be if they're in Math and Business Double Degree right?!--WRONG. Qi's so hilarious because she makes the driest comments when you least expect them. She's also very smart and down-to-earth. Normally, I get along better with guys because they're less ditzy, but Qi can make guys seem ditzy. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying she's MANLY--no, that's apparently my job--you should see her play badminton; she drives the bird over the net and then manages to pull off that Asian sign so well without looking like an annoying fob. ^-^V
Interesting Fact: I recognized that Qi lived on my street within the first few days because I recognized her distinctive red Coach purse. THAT'S RIGHT I AM THE PRO CREEPER. No, seriously--no one appreciates brand names fashion and style more than Qi (mind you, an appreciation practiced in healthy moderation).
4. Cathy: If I had to vouch for anyone's dedication and hard work in TC, it would be for Cathy. She always takes a half lunch and stays late whenever she has to hang around campus for class anyway. At first glance, Cathy seems like a shy, quiet Asian. Wrong. Again. Not only is she a valuable employee, but she is also a great friend and fun to hang around. However, I am extremely mad at her because she has shown up to 1 out of our 4 outings--NOT A PASSING GRADE--forget Macroecon, Cathy. Come to the darkside; we have cookies. ^-^
5. Brian: So after I talk about this co-worker, I'll talk about the guys--oh wait, I completely forgot Brian was a guy because he's always showing up to the outings when all the other guys ditch!! My first impression of Brian was that he was a nerd, only hanging out with us to invite us to play DS during our breaks. Annnd my impression hasn't changed--just kidding. Brian's a nice guy, my mixed doubles buddy, and my partner in crime for bullying Cynthia. *high five, Brian Kim Chi.
6. Matt: Okay, this is the only person at CECS that I do not like AT ALL. Like seriously. He always makes me laugh, he makes amazing lunches for himself every day, and he visits me at least twice a day just to say what's up. I call him my guidance counsellor for what English courses to (not) take. Seriously, how can you not hate him too? P.S. He and Cathy are tied at a failing grade of 25%. Tsk.Tsk.Tsk.
So yeah, pretty much I've made some amazing friends at CECS. At the beginning of the term, I was a little hesitant about going on co-op outings--like oh man things are going to be so awkward! Nothing against these people or my first impressions of them, but I'm just not that good at getting to know new people. Now that I know them much better and our hangouts have become a must (instead of some strange networking/co-worker courtesy thing), I hope our new-found friendships are meant to last us through our dreaded extended education here in UW.
Thank you, co-op. We indeed have a love-hate relationship going on here.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Sugar, Spice, and Everything Nice
Per request by one of my friends, I have decided to share my opinion on "the nice guy". Since this topic has been over-analyzed by SO many people, especially on youtube and stuff, anything I bring up probably won't be anything you haven't heard before, but here's my opinion anyway. =)
nice
Even though I'm a pretty mean and cynical person myself, I tend to have a lot of "nice guy" friends. Common things I notice about the "nice guy" is that they tend to have a soft spot for girls, but it's usually pretty hard to believe they are a member of the "more perverted" gender. I guess one of the big issues is why are they the most frequent victims of heartbreaking girls?
Personally, there's nothing wrong with the nice guy. Nice guys are perfect gentlemen. They're loyal, maintain a pleasing level of sensitivity, and everything about them seems so sincere and genuine. From my experience with my own nice guy friends, they tend to fall for the wrong girls. I don't know, maybe they just want to have a partner that has an opposite personality. Although they're nice and all, they tend to go for a more demanding girl or someone that doesn't really know how to dish out rejection too well. The fact that the nice guys thirst for the most brutal rejections must be just another cruel trick that life has up its sleeve. --Or maybe nice guys are massochistic, who knows?
Just like the nice guy feels like they're not outgoing or attractive enough to attract "the girl of their dreams", there are tons of ladies out there who feel the exact same way. That said, don't get too hung up on a single rejection. Like I've expressed before, if a relationship is meant to happen, it will; don't dwell on ridiculous fantasies or beat yourself up about something that you can't do anything about. Personally, I wouldn't mind dating the nice guy, and I'm sure there are plenty of girls out there with a similar opinion. Nice guys just have to be patient enough to wait for the right girl to come around. :)
nice
–adjective, nic⋅er, nic⋅est.
| 1. | pleasing; agreeable; delightful: a nice visit. |
| 2. | amiably pleasant; kind: They are always nice to strangers. |
| 3. | characterized by, showing, or requiring great accuracy, precision, skill, tact, care, or delicacy: nice workmanship; a nice shot; a nice handling of a crisis. |
Even though I'm a pretty mean and cynical person myself, I tend to have a lot of "nice guy" friends. Common things I notice about the "nice guy" is that they tend to have a soft spot for girls, but it's usually pretty hard to believe they are a member of the "more perverted" gender. I guess one of the big issues is why are they the most frequent victims of heartbreaking girls?
Personally, there's nothing wrong with the nice guy. Nice guys are perfect gentlemen. They're loyal, maintain a pleasing level of sensitivity, and everything about them seems so sincere and genuine. From my experience with my own nice guy friends, they tend to fall for the wrong girls. I don't know, maybe they just want to have a partner that has an opposite personality. Although they're nice and all, they tend to go for a more demanding girl or someone that doesn't really know how to dish out rejection too well. The fact that the nice guys thirst for the most brutal rejections must be just another cruel trick that life has up its sleeve. --Or maybe nice guys are massochistic, who knows?
Just like the nice guy feels like they're not outgoing or attractive enough to attract "the girl of their dreams", there are tons of ladies out there who feel the exact same way. That said, don't get too hung up on a single rejection. Like I've expressed before, if a relationship is meant to happen, it will; don't dwell on ridiculous fantasies or beat yourself up about something that you can't do anything about. Personally, I wouldn't mind dating the nice guy, and I'm sure there are plenty of girls out there with a similar opinion. Nice guys just have to be patient enough to wait for the right girl to come around. :)
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Are you afraid of the dark?
Personally, I'm not that afraid of the dark. Of course it depends on what kind of sounds are going on in the background and where I am, but generally I am not. Usually people are afraid of the dark because of the crazy ideas that movies put into our heads or simply our own imaginations. We need to separate real life from the cinema. Of course, sometimes it's just fun to pretend to be scared or to scream with your friends, but I am generally fearless in the dark--just a bit blind. However, there are several things that I am afraid of:
1. Touching slimy animals or certain insects. I don't have a problem with killing flies or mosquitoes in my hands (or with kleenexes) or sweeping spiders to the outdoors, but I definitely won't volunteer to pet a spider, bait a worm, or touch any other slimy creature. The only insect I don't mind touching are ladybugs cuz they're just so pretty and...lady-like? I suppose this fear has also affected my second fear.
2. The ocean and its wildlife. Not only are these creatures slimy, but in grade 5, we studied a lot of sea creatures in moderate detail. Almost everything has some sharp, electrical, slimy, poisonous defense, so I refuse to go snorkeling or venture into ocean waters deeper than 1/4 my height. Even when I've gone swimming in the lake water at my cottage and floating seaweed brushes against me, I get freaked out. To protect myself from any native wildlife, I try to move my legs around a lot so they know to stay away from me.
3. Heights. Pretty common, so there's not much to be said about this one. Basically it has prevented me from volunteering to participate in things such as rock climbing, diving, going on amusement park rides, or even thinking of even attempting any of those extreme sports like bungee jumping, sky diving, parachuting, etc.
4. Public humiliation. The way I see it, almost everyone has this fear; people just protect themselves from it in different ways. To make my point more easily, I'll default to the high school sterotypes: Basically, the popular kids declare themselves as such; giving themselves immunity against all jokes redirected at them. They also have the power of numbers. I suspect this is also why people establish BFFs...in the case that everything happens to go wrong, they can just go to this one person and pretend not to care what the rest of the world thinks. The only flaw with this concept is that often in these popular circles, the "bff" often turns out to be the big backstabber.
The rebellious "weird" kids are pretty similar to the popular group. The only difference is that the justification for their actions is to counteract the damage done by the popular group. Their life purpose is to do or say weird things just to prove that an opposite extreme exists. Most members of this group pride themselves on being hyperactive/crazy and showing everyone that they are having the most fun acting that way.
Lastly, there are the middleground nobodies who'd rather be invisible. I'd like to include myself in this group because I can identify directly with what I believe is their underlying rationale. Motto: Don't do anything outstanding and nothing about you will stand out for people to make fun of.
Whether you can identify with any of these stereotypical groups or not, my point was that everyone has put up their own form of defense against public humiliation. After all, who sincerely wants to be the big joke shared around the table or the latest hot topic for gossip?
5. Failure.
To tell you the truth, failure itself is not my true fear, but rather the side-effects of failure. My biggest fear is disappointing people. You're probably thinking, "Well yeah, you're an Asian with strict Asian parents; Of course you're scared of getting the bamboo stick!" No, it's actually not like that at all. Before my big transformation from being a passive student who just went to school everyday like camp to a dedicated student who realized the importance of grades, my mom yelled at me a lot to do my homework and improve my studies. At the time, I thought yelling was just one of those mom jobs, but then I realized she cared about my success. To be honest, I don't really care about my own success, but I am motivated in all that I do to fulfill the expectations of my family, my friends, coworkers, etc. If I disappointed them, I would feel that I am not making it worth their while to take care of me, befriend me, or even care that I exist. As a result, I crack easily under pressure because all I can think about is the worst case scenario of all-around disappointment. I also prefer to be underestimated or have people expect nothing of me and be pleasantly surprised.
OVERALL, I'd like to think I'm braver than the average girl. I'm not afraid of germs, getting dirty, killing bugs, breaking a nail, or having bad hair days. But really, I can't claim I'm any better than a soft girly girl because they handle basic things like high-pressure situations or swimming in the ocean way better than I could ever hope to.
People often say you should work on getting over your fears by facing them instead of running away. I partially disagree because fears are not always irrational. Often there are morals or prior experience behind these rationalizations that other people may not understand. Taking the example of rollercoasters, I don't like riding them because the heights and upside-down manoeuvers are not one of my preferred methods of dying. My fear of rollercoasters is still plausible because there have been a lot of amusement park accidents...the fact that I am afraid shows that I weight the risk involved in this activity more than others.
People's fears are like personal values or characteristics that define who they are. Instead of forcing people to face their fears, I think one should just be there to support and help them through it whenever they ask for it and, more importantly, when they're not smart enough to ask for it.
1. Touching slimy animals or certain insects. I don't have a problem with killing flies or mosquitoes in my hands (or with kleenexes) or sweeping spiders to the outdoors, but I definitely won't volunteer to pet a spider, bait a worm, or touch any other slimy creature. The only insect I don't mind touching are ladybugs cuz they're just so pretty and...lady-like? I suppose this fear has also affected my second fear.
2. The ocean and its wildlife. Not only are these creatures slimy, but in grade 5, we studied a lot of sea creatures in moderate detail. Almost everything has some sharp, electrical, slimy, poisonous defense, so I refuse to go snorkeling or venture into ocean waters deeper than 1/4 my height. Even when I've gone swimming in the lake water at my cottage and floating seaweed brushes against me, I get freaked out. To protect myself from any native wildlife, I try to move my legs around a lot so they know to stay away from me.
3. Heights. Pretty common, so there's not much to be said about this one. Basically it has prevented me from volunteering to participate in things such as rock climbing, diving, going on amusement park rides, or even thinking of even attempting any of those extreme sports like bungee jumping, sky diving, parachuting, etc.
4. Public humiliation. The way I see it, almost everyone has this fear; people just protect themselves from it in different ways. To make my point more easily, I'll default to the high school sterotypes: Basically, the popular kids declare themselves as such; giving themselves immunity against all jokes redirected at them. They also have the power of numbers. I suspect this is also why people establish BFFs...in the case that everything happens to go wrong, they can just go to this one person and pretend not to care what the rest of the world thinks. The only flaw with this concept is that often in these popular circles, the "bff" often turns out to be the big backstabber.
The rebellious "weird" kids are pretty similar to the popular group. The only difference is that the justification for their actions is to counteract the damage done by the popular group. Their life purpose is to do or say weird things just to prove that an opposite extreme exists. Most members of this group pride themselves on being hyperactive/crazy and showing everyone that they are having the most fun acting that way.
Lastly, there are the middleground nobodies who'd rather be invisible. I'd like to include myself in this group because I can identify directly with what I believe is their underlying rationale. Motto: Don't do anything outstanding and nothing about you will stand out for people to make fun of.
Whether you can identify with any of these stereotypical groups or not, my point was that everyone has put up their own form of defense against public humiliation. After all, who sincerely wants to be the big joke shared around the table or the latest hot topic for gossip?
5. Failure.
To tell you the truth, failure itself is not my true fear, but rather the side-effects of failure. My biggest fear is disappointing people. You're probably thinking, "Well yeah, you're an Asian with strict Asian parents; Of course you're scared of getting the bamboo stick!" No, it's actually not like that at all. Before my big transformation from being a passive student who just went to school everyday like camp to a dedicated student who realized the importance of grades, my mom yelled at me a lot to do my homework and improve my studies. At the time, I thought yelling was just one of those mom jobs, but then I realized she cared about my success. To be honest, I don't really care about my own success, but I am motivated in all that I do to fulfill the expectations of my family, my friends, coworkers, etc. If I disappointed them, I would feel that I am not making it worth their while to take care of me, befriend me, or even care that I exist. As a result, I crack easily under pressure because all I can think about is the worst case scenario of all-around disappointment. I also prefer to be underestimated or have people expect nothing of me and be pleasantly surprised.
OVERALL, I'd like to think I'm braver than the average girl. I'm not afraid of germs, getting dirty, killing bugs, breaking a nail, or having bad hair days. But really, I can't claim I'm any better than a soft girly girl because they handle basic things like high-pressure situations or swimming in the ocean way better than I could ever hope to.
People often say you should work on getting over your fears by facing them instead of running away. I partially disagree because fears are not always irrational. Often there are morals or prior experience behind these rationalizations that other people may not understand. Taking the example of rollercoasters, I don't like riding them because the heights and upside-down manoeuvers are not one of my preferred methods of dying. My fear of rollercoasters is still plausible because there have been a lot of amusement park accidents...the fact that I am afraid shows that I weight the risk involved in this activity more than others.
People's fears are like personal values or characteristics that define who they are. Instead of forcing people to face their fears, I think one should just be there to support and help them through it whenever they ask for it and, more importantly, when they're not smart enough to ask for it.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
BF...F?
Why do we have friends? Humans are naturally lonely creatures who almost always need someone to talk to and cheer us up when the chips are down. Believe me, my lonely old neighbour makes the tiniest excuse to invite us over, invite herself over, or even just talk to us for a small favour. The small minority of people who survive with minimal outside contact are usually...
-grumpy
-friends with a non-human companion (e.g. a dog, goldfish, an imaginary friend, aliens...maybe?)
-sad but unsure how to integrate themselves into society
-just simply NOT HUMAN, just kidding (but this is a very, very TINY minority)
Personally, I have a different issue with the topic of friendship. I believe in and value it, but I don't expect each one to last too long. Whenever I inform my current friends that I don't believe in long term friendship or I don't have a BEST FRIEND, they go into immediate shock. "Oh my God, you're a horrible person! You don't like me? We're gonna stay friends forever, you'll see!"--or at least they'll think something along those lines to themself and never admit it out loud. But the truth is...there's no such thing as friends forever.
Realistically, it's unlikely for two individuals from different families to both live in the same town or even province/state (if talking about N.A.)/country for their entire lives. Also, remember that people are always "changing". Depending on how much time you spend with them or how frequently you see them determines whether or not you notice it and how much it interferes in your friendship. Being even a 45 minute drive away from your friends, makes it difficult to keep in touch, particularly if you're not retired and you have a bunch of annoying things to attend such as school, work, or local social gatherings. OH and as a side note, many of the things I post about are my interpretations of personal experience, so it's not 100% my imagination.
STORY TIME:
I attended a private Christian school for my elementary education from grades 3-8. I made some amazing friends there, and we all got really close because 6 years is quite a long time when you're around that preadolescent age. So anyways, I actually had TWO--wow, I can't believe Christie's such a hypocrite!--best friends. They were Spanish, I felt totally comfortable around them (even comfortable enough to fight a lot actually--you know the typical girl fight, "I'm not talking to you" thing), the 3 of us lived a 5-10 minute bike ride away from each other, we talked about everything together (from classroom gossip to puberty experiences), we randomly showed up at each other's houses with 5 minutes notice, and we pretty much did everything together. That was an era of bliss and naivety where I believed in the prepubescent BFF doctrine with all my heart.
Graduation came. I was going to Cawthra, V was going to Mentor (hehe) College, and Pam was going to King's Collegiate. I even moved to opposite end of Mississauga, soon followed by Veronica (who I STILL haven't visited). Sure, no problem, we'll just hang out a lot and phone each other everyday. A few weeks into my grade 9 year, a series of phone calls ensued, "I don't think we'll be able to hang out this week", or "I'm kind of busy and I can't get a ride to your house". Darn that driving age of 16, huh? Thus, we settled for calling each other frequently. I talked to Pam almost everyday, updating her on everything...the kind of people at Cawthra, how the high school life compared to my expectations, any cute guys (HAH), and how we were gonna hang out again--the usual BFF stuff, you know? Eventually, the phone calls started getting shorter, filled out with awkward silences, and eventually both of us started getting too busy to return each other's calls. MSN and facebook would definitely not cut it--isn't the phone bad enough? Btw, for anyone who hasn't known me before high school, I used to use the phone A LOT. My parents would always be telling me to get off after the first couple hours. I never thought I would be one of those phoneline-hogging teenagers, but it's a disease that hits around...oh, late elementary school, I would say, so watch out for it when you have kids! But yeah, our friendship slowly faded away, and we each started making a new set of friends at our respective schools. Despite a comfortable transition between friend groups, there was still an unsettling feeling in my stomach and the sadness was sort of slow to hit me.
One day, my high school friend Irene gave me a big present bag full of goodies, and notes from my other close friend Nina, since they go to the same church. I felt really excited to get a second chance to maintain another elementary school friendship. The vicious notewriting on our oh-so-three-years-ago Lovely White paper began. We talked about the cherished past, the awkward present, and our possible post-secondary ambitions, which fed the conversation for a while. I tried to send stuff back, and we even made a scrapbook which we passed back and forth. It was really fun and it made me feel like I was making a better effort toward this friendship--but you can guess what happened: The same slowdown in communication, lack of things to talk about, and frequent writer's block. Even if we did manage to keep our communication going, was it practical for us to meet up through a 45 minute drive or should I make stronger connections with other kids at my high school, who were maybe a 15 minute drive away or could hang out after school? Eventually that communication ended too, and I realized I had to move on.
I'm not saying MOVE ON like it was easy. It was really hard, and that's probably what has scarred my perspective of friendship. Having to give up great friends, who were almost sisters to me, because of impractical circumstances. We even had a few summer gatherings at my house with a few movies (e.g. Borat, Step Up2, and other things I can't remember), sleepovers, gossiping about elementary people who changed (or got hotter -_-"), and chilling out with heaps of junk food. It was refreshing and it definitely felt right. However, I knew I couldn't get too comfortable because in a few more hours they were going to go back to their own lives, a 45 minutes' drive away. I actually felt really bad when one of my friends asked who was my best friend, while Pam was there. All I could think to do was be honest, "I don't have one." It kind of created an awkward moment and I'm sure Pam was hurt at least a little. Well, it hurt for me at least. Anyway, after all this letting go, I didn't feel like getting close to anyone at Cawthra. Most of them didn't even live near Cawthra, so it wasn't that convenient. Besides, we were only spending 4 years together, then we'd all be separated again.
Even in university, people are spending 4-5 years in undergrad, then they'll all be pursuing their own paths such as working, doing a master's, different co-op sequences, professional school, and perhaps even switching/dropping out. Even if you end up going to the same university as a friend, it's difficult to stay in touch with them if they don't have the same classes or practically live with you because you're always working, studying with other kids in your program, or participating in clubs that you're interested in--oh yeah, and exercise fits somewhere in there...but yeah, my main point is (I realize I go off topic a lot, because I don't want to forget what I'm thinking) that we make "friends" whenever it is convenient. Someone to keep us sane and work beside us. Someone with similar goals to cheer each other on. Sadly, someone who we can access without making TOO much extraneous effort.
Thanks to all my friends that have ever been, are, and are to come.
-grumpy
-friends with a non-human companion (e.g. a dog, goldfish, an imaginary friend, aliens...maybe?)
-sad but unsure how to integrate themselves into society
-just simply NOT HUMAN, just kidding (but this is a very, very TINY minority)
Personally, I have a different issue with the topic of friendship. I believe in and value it, but I don't expect each one to last too long. Whenever I inform my current friends that I don't believe in long term friendship or I don't have a BEST FRIEND, they go into immediate shock. "Oh my God, you're a horrible person! You don't like me? We're gonna stay friends forever, you'll see!"--or at least they'll think something along those lines to themself and never admit it out loud. But the truth is...there's no such thing as friends forever.
Realistically, it's unlikely for two individuals from different families to both live in the same town or even province/state (if talking about N.A.)/country for their entire lives. Also, remember that people are always "changing". Depending on how much time you spend with them or how frequently you see them determines whether or not you notice it and how much it interferes in your friendship. Being even a 45 minute drive away from your friends, makes it difficult to keep in touch, particularly if you're not retired and you have a bunch of annoying things to attend such as school, work, or local social gatherings. OH and as a side note, many of the things I post about are my interpretations of personal experience, so it's not 100% my imagination.
STORY TIME:
I attended a private Christian school for my elementary education from grades 3-8. I made some amazing friends there, and we all got really close because 6 years is quite a long time when you're around that preadolescent age. So anyways, I actually had TWO--wow, I can't believe Christie's such a hypocrite!--best friends. They were Spanish, I felt totally comfortable around them (even comfortable enough to fight a lot actually--you know the typical girl fight, "I'm not talking to you" thing), the 3 of us lived a 5-10 minute bike ride away from each other, we talked about everything together (from classroom gossip to puberty experiences), we randomly showed up at each other's houses with 5 minutes notice, and we pretty much did everything together. That was an era of bliss and naivety where I believed in the prepubescent BFF doctrine with all my heart.
Graduation came. I was going to Cawthra, V was going to Mentor (hehe) College, and Pam was going to King's Collegiate. I even moved to opposite end of Mississauga, soon followed by Veronica (who I STILL haven't visited). Sure, no problem, we'll just hang out a lot and phone each other everyday. A few weeks into my grade 9 year, a series of phone calls ensued, "I don't think we'll be able to hang out this week", or "I'm kind of busy and I can't get a ride to your house". Darn that driving age of 16, huh? Thus, we settled for calling each other frequently. I talked to Pam almost everyday, updating her on everything...the kind of people at Cawthra, how the high school life compared to my expectations, any cute guys (HAH), and how we were gonna hang out again--the usual BFF stuff, you know? Eventually, the phone calls started getting shorter, filled out with awkward silences, and eventually both of us started getting too busy to return each other's calls. MSN and facebook would definitely not cut it--isn't the phone bad enough? Btw, for anyone who hasn't known me before high school, I used to use the phone A LOT. My parents would always be telling me to get off after the first couple hours. I never thought I would be one of those phoneline-hogging teenagers, but it's a disease that hits around...oh, late elementary school, I would say, so watch out for it when you have kids! But yeah, our friendship slowly faded away, and we each started making a new set of friends at our respective schools. Despite a comfortable transition between friend groups, there was still an unsettling feeling in my stomach and the sadness was sort of slow to hit me.
One day, my high school friend Irene gave me a big present bag full of goodies, and notes from my other close friend Nina, since they go to the same church. I felt really excited to get a second chance to maintain another elementary school friendship. The vicious notewriting on our oh-so-three-years-ago Lovely White paper began. We talked about the cherished past, the awkward present, and our possible post-secondary ambitions, which fed the conversation for a while. I tried to send stuff back, and we even made a scrapbook which we passed back and forth. It was really fun and it made me feel like I was making a better effort toward this friendship--but you can guess what happened: The same slowdown in communication, lack of things to talk about, and frequent writer's block. Even if we did manage to keep our communication going, was it practical for us to meet up through a 45 minute drive or should I make stronger connections with other kids at my high school, who were maybe a 15 minute drive away or could hang out after school? Eventually that communication ended too, and I realized I had to move on.
I'm not saying MOVE ON like it was easy. It was really hard, and that's probably what has scarred my perspective of friendship. Having to give up great friends, who were almost sisters to me, because of impractical circumstances. We even had a few summer gatherings at my house with a few movies (e.g. Borat, Step Up2, and other things I can't remember), sleepovers, gossiping about elementary people who changed (or got hotter -_-"), and chilling out with heaps of junk food. It was refreshing and it definitely felt right. However, I knew I couldn't get too comfortable because in a few more hours they were going to go back to their own lives, a 45 minutes' drive away. I actually felt really bad when one of my friends asked who was my best friend, while Pam was there. All I could think to do was be honest, "I don't have one." It kind of created an awkward moment and I'm sure Pam was hurt at least a little. Well, it hurt for me at least. Anyway, after all this letting go, I didn't feel like getting close to anyone at Cawthra. Most of them didn't even live near Cawthra, so it wasn't that convenient. Besides, we were only spending 4 years together, then we'd all be separated again.
Even in university, people are spending 4-5 years in undergrad, then they'll all be pursuing their own paths such as working, doing a master's, different co-op sequences, professional school, and perhaps even switching/dropping out. Even if you end up going to the same university as a friend, it's difficult to stay in touch with them if they don't have the same classes or practically live with you because you're always working, studying with other kids in your program, or participating in clubs that you're interested in--oh yeah, and exercise fits somewhere in there...but yeah, my main point is (I realize I go off topic a lot, because I don't want to forget what I'm thinking) that we make "friends" whenever it is convenient. Someone to keep us sane and work beside us. Someone with similar goals to cheer each other on. Sadly, someone who we can access without making TOO much extraneous effort.
In fact, I DO have a best friend now: my cousin Katie. Same age, similar interests, totally comfortable around each other, we easily agree to disagree, I always learn new things from her, and I would trust her with my life. I'm so thankful that I have a cousin that I can depend on like a sister and who is the same age as me. Since she is also family, that makes our friendship tie stronger than your average BFF pair, and we have a better chance of living within comfortable proximity to each other. That way, we can take on life's challenges together, offering advice and an honest opinion to one another wherever possible.
Soooo, does this million word rant mean I think my friends are using me and I'm just using them? N-O--W-A-Y. Just because I don't believe in the long term friendship, it doesn't mean I don't CHOOSE to hang out with the people who are both accessible and likable in the present. Trust me, I'm pretty picky and judgemental of people, so if you made the cut, you must be doing something right. Also, just because we won't be friends forever, it doesn't mean you won't have impacted my life forever. Even if I refuse to let you change or affect who I am, I will still remember and look to you as a model of comparison for making new friends on my personal journey through life.Thanks to all my friends that have ever been, are, and are to come.
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